Best of the Best: Mormon Movies

Due to my faith, which would be the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, me and my family and friends have knowledge of one of the bigger branches of American independent filmmaking: Mollywood. Yes, Mollywood, that small little frontier of film production by the Mormon community. No matter you're opinion, these are not just tolerable but actually great films made by dedicated LDS filmmmakers. And these are the cream of the Utah crop...

The Best Two Years (2003)
I'm putting the best on first, which I know you're supposed to do last but I just want to get it out of the way. This is probably the "Citizen Kane" of Mor-vies. While other films are either all comedy or all drama, this has even doses of both, making for a very satisfying and realistic movie. Filmed on location in the Netherlands, the tale follows two pairs of Mormon missionaries as one of them, Elder Rogers, deals with his lack of faith and a new "greenie" mission-mate Elder Calhoun. Highly recommended, especially if you find missionaries annoying.


Baptists at our Barbecue (2004)
Think "Deliverance", without all the perverted stuff. That's the kind of small town our main character, Clark Bender, finds himself in after getting a transfer in order to escape Provo. It's also where he tries to end a nasty feud between the equally-large Mormon and Baptist communities, all while trying to get close to a beautiful blonde girl named Charity. Has some laugh-out-loud moments, and provides a nice and quirky look at religion that you can't get anywhere else.

The R.M. (2004)
Undoubtedly one of the best Mo-comedies ever, The R.M. has the ability to always be funny, no matter how many times you watch it. Missionary Jared Phelps finds a completely different world from the one he remembers when he returns home from Wyoming. When one thing after the other goes horribly wrong, Jared wonders why serving the Lord for two whole years has gotten him into this mess, and how he will ever get back up. Weird Mormons at their best.

One Good Man (2009)
"Minimalist masterpiece" might sound a bit much, but that's the kind of filmmaking being done here to give a modern-day fable about a LDS dad trying to stay strong during a tough time a good , charming atmosphere. This movie also proves that you don't need to be gross or mean-spirited to make a great family drama (ahem, "American Beauty").

The Singles Ward/The Singles 2nd Ward (2002/2007)
Both these films have a great and funny look at Mormon dating and marriage, but I enjoyed "The 2nd Ward" better. Fluffy, romantic, and not without soul, and if you like those things, this is good stuff.

The Home Teachers (2004)
Despite being a box office and critical bomb, this is still a pretty funny Mormon version of "Planes, Trains, and Automobiles", with a good message at the end just like the latter film. Greg Blazer and Nelson Parker are two very different peas in a pod: Greg doesn't take his religion seriously, and Nelson takes it too seriously. Fortunately, the two both learn valuable lessons when they partner up for a disastrous and hilarious afternoon of Home Teaching. Still a good film.

Sons of Provo (2004)
One of the funniest of the funny, this is one comedy every Mormon has to see, and that has enough slapstick and boy-band mockery to appeal somewhat to non-members. A "This Is Spinal Tap"-style mockumentary, the movie follows the gut-busting misadventures of the boy-band Everclean as they try to survive the Utah pop-music scene (or lack thereof). Songs are both funny and unintentionally funky.

Blow off the Bunny: The 2 Best Religious Easter films

This weekend marks both Easter and Passover Seder, and you know what that means: out of the hundreds of people buying chocolate and bunny decorations, there's going to be a small minority of us paying attention to more serious matters. Both Jew and Christian alike will spend the weekend learning about and remembering important moments in religious and worldwide history, and that can mean a chance to see our old Easter favorites. And no, that doesn't mean "The Ten Commandments", which can be substituted for these two awesomer (and in my opinion, more powerful) films:

1. Ben-Hur ( William Wyler, 1959 )

Despite massive sets and a cast of hundreds, Ben-Hur still manages to keep an eye on the human aspect of the story. Ben's fury and violent revenge on his former BFF Messala is a great character flaw, and makes his newfound Christianity at the climax of the film a genuinely redeeming moment. The Crucifixion is presented well, with music and the reactions of others replacing the need for gore and brutality (ex. "The Passion of the Christ"). This movie also boasts the best ( and most dangerous ) chariot race scene, as well as the great decision to never show Christ's face, only his actions. This is an epic tale that never forgets the very personal core: Jesus Christ being the Redeemer of all.

2. The Prince of Egypt ( Brenda Champan+Simon Wells+Steve Hickner, 1998 )

"Prince" is a great movie, a worthy first picture from the Dreamworks team. Not only is it suitably powerful and heartwarming, but it's open enough for every religion to enjoy, rather than just the Hebrew community. That said, this might be better for Passover celebrations than Easter. "Prince of Egypt" is an ideal film to help kids better understand the story of the Exodus that is revered by several major faiths, and is also mature enough for adults to enjoy. While Val Kilmer is an odd choice to voice Moses, it's barely noticeable amid the perfect storytelling and intense soundtrack. So just pop in this gem once you're done lighting the Menorah and reciting the...wait a minute, I think I'm mixing up holidays...

Well, that's my critique of the two movies I feel are the best to show this time of year. Hope you agree, and Happy Easter/Passover!

The Silmarillion Movie: Yes or No?

After "Lord of the Rings", it seemed like anything was filmable. If Peter Jackson was able to bring Tolkien's grand opus to life on the silver screen, why not anything else? One failed "Watchmen" adaptation later, people are starting to think that there are some books that can't be touched. And one of these is "The Silmarillion".

While not nearly as famous as "LOTR", Tolkien's Middle-Earth version of the Bible is a hot topic among die-hard J.R.R fans. Is it truly Tolkien's work, if his son compiled and added parts of it? What is it's intended place in the M-E canon? But if one thing is for sure, it's that many of us Tolkienites would be perfectly cool with an awesome film version of it. But why would or wouldn't it work?

Well, it wouldn't work because, for one thing, it's far too long. You thought the Harry Potter movies were too much, imagine four 0r five 4-hour long films coming out every two years. Yeah, it would be HUGE. Secondly, the public is sadly unaware, and probably uninterested, in this saga, and so probably wouldn't flock to the theatres the same way they did for LOTR. Untop of all this, "The Silm." is NOT NEARLY as light and cheerful as LOTR was at some moments. Compared to the funny and happy moments where Legolas and Gimli traded height jokes, TS is as dark and tragic a collection of stories as you can wish to get. From the Fall of The Children Of Hurin, in which a human named Turin unknowingly marries and impregnates his own sister Neinor, causing both of them to commit suicide, it's clear to see this is not for the average viewer.

Now for my point of view, which states that a "Silmarillion" movie can and should be made. Yes, it would be a MASSIVE (I love capitals) project, and would probably require an international team of directors, scholars, visual artists, actors, and producers the likes of which the worldwide filmaking community has never seen before. Yes we're talking not one, but a series of million-dollar, "Lawrence of Arabia"-style epics with no happy endings, only new beginnings. But special effects and the ability to realize fantasy worlds have become almost limitless, so a TS film would be at least possible to do. People have also shown an appetite for Tolkien, if LOTR's success is anything to go by, so it's not like a film would be a total flop. It may seem like an impossible task, but with the right team and family of hard-working film wizards, anything is manageable.

I guess I can see why Christopher Tolkien is reluctant to allow a "Silmarillion" movie. I mean, this is his father's baby, his life's work, his ninth symphony. This would have to be a MAGNIFICENT series (yes, Capitals!!!) to be able to sit right and please everyone, but it's not like it's impossible. More like miracle-working. This would have to top the "Lord of the Rings" film trilogy, or we risk disturbing J.R.R's rest. May the Valar be with us.

Movies I want to see before I Die (Part 2)

And now to conclude the list of awesome films to see before I die, exhaustively researched and meticulously presented (Okay, not quite, but I put thought into this). If you have any movies you're dying to see as well, just post them. I can always learn from others...

Pan's Labyrinth (Guillermo Del Toro, 2006)
A dark fantasy with creepy yet beautiful visuals, monstrous creatures, and it's in the language of my fathers (Espanol, baby!). Not much left to say.

The Great Dictator, The Gold Rush, and basically any other Chaplin comedy (Charlie Chaplin, early 1900's)
I've seen about a third of The Great Dictator, and it was great enough to make me more interested in seeing the other films the Tramp has to offer.

The Battle of Algiers (Gillo Pontecorvo, 1966)
One of THE great war films, this exposing documentary-like dramatization of the Algerian war also boasts one of the greatest movie titles ever.

Duck Soup and any other Marx film (Marx Brothers, early 1900's)
I have NEVER seen the Marx Bros, and I'm curious to see how they measure up to Chaplin and the Stooges.

Stalker (Andrei Tarkovsky, 1979)
This Soviet sci-fi classic sounds interesting, and, even though I already went and spoiled the entire movie for myself on Wikipedia, hopefully I'll forget what happens by the time I see it.

The Dark Crystal (Jim Henson + Frank Oz, 1982)
All the strange creatures and detail and tiny felt characters of the Muppet Show, but with an epic quest and a struggle between good and evil. Sure sounds weird, but it was ahead of it's time enough to still be groundbreaking. A pyschadelic "Lord of the Rings"-type fantasy with a cast made up entirely of puppets definitely would be interesting to experience.

Of Gods and Men (Xavier Beauvois, 2010)
This came out recently, and has been sweeping up prizes, including the prestigious Grand Prix at Cannes. I'm drawn to this movie about Trappist monks struggling during the Algerian Civil War for some odd reason, perhaps because it's such an obscure area that this movie covers, that being religious people surviving in Algeria.

That pretty much sums up my list. I was forced to exclude some movies (Apocalypse Now, Brazil, The Host) due to their R rating (Pan's L. is 14A here in Canada, so it's all good), but other than that I tried to stay as faithful to my tastes as possible. Hope you had your celluloid appetite wheted as much as I did.

Movies I want to see before I Die (Part 1)

We all have movies we are interested in the minute we hear about them. And discovering

new movies to add to our list of favorites is now a part of life for many people, including myself. And judging by the amount of films I am about to list as potential favourites, I have a lot to see, and maybe you can find some films here you would be interested in...

Ran (Akira Kurosawa, 1985)

Other than the fact that it looks stunning, this movie apparently has one of the all-time greatest battle scenes ever, with no sound other than the atmospheric soundtrack. Eerie.

The Dark Knight (Christopher Nolan, 2008)

It is true, I have not seen one of the best superhero movies ever. I am too young, and it requires an intelligent and mature mind to truly appreciate a realistic thriller like so. And I can go several more years without the Joker plaguieng my nightmares.

Metropolis (Fritz Lang, 1927)

A expressionistic look at the future, "Metropolis" is the ancient classic every film buff wants to see. And it seems that "Metropolis"'s prediction of workers toiling underground for the rich elite living in above-ground utopias isn't too far from the present. Notice how C3-PO is directly inspired by the Doppelganger robot here.

Ikiru (Akira Kurosawa, 1952)

I want to see how much I cry at the end.

The Apu Trilogy (Satyajit Ray, 1955-59)

Considered the golden apple of Indian cinema, this trilogy tells the life of Apu Roy from childhood to single-parenthood in India. While the films may sound boring and uneventful, their said to have a "magic horse of poetry" (whatever the heck that means) that makes the whole thing worthwhile.

THX 1138 (George Lucas, 1971)

It's weird how Lucas can go from expiremental to selling lunchboxes. But that's the odd story of his career, which started with this highly-stylized rendition of the "1984" story. And I would be really interested to see what was in George's mind before blockbuster success forever turned him mainstream. Also, thanks to DVD technology, I can just skip that one nudie scene...

Safety Last! (Fred C. Newmeyer, 1923)

I was first introduced to black and white comedy by the Three Stooges, and my brothers and I have now grown fond of watching some good slapstick with our dad. Now, as I find out more about the good ol' days of comedy, I realize there are many more hilarious and dangerous antics to see.

Well, that should do it for today. But, as they say in Back To The Future Part 2... To Be Concluded!